I Haven't Had A Breakdown...Yet.

It's approaching a month since I was laid off from my dreaded job, and I still don't have any new job prospects. I'm also 1 month away from moving out of my apartment into a new more expensive apartment alone, with no job and no income coming in to pay the rent. Life sort of just smacked me in the face really hard but I never felt the sting. Moving wasn't my decision, it was sprung on me about a month before my job went kaput. My roommate and her fiance have to move to Florida due to a job promotion. That was all well and fine, it was time for us to separate anyways since I started to crave my own space again. So here I am getting exactly what I wanted in the worst way and I'm not afraid, worried or stressed.

Oh, and did I mention my roommate is getting married in a month and I'm supposed to be planning the bachelorette party which I have yet to start planning? Not that I'm not excited for her but it's the last thing on my mind right now. Living with a stressed out bride when you have your own shit going on is no fun.

I never get stressed about being homeless or lack of money because I know money will always arrive, someway somehow. Normally, what I would stress out and cry about is having a setback. Another setback, 2 steps forward and 1 step back seems to be my life. For some reason this time, I don't see it as a setback but a step forward. Everything that's happening is exactly what I need. God is separating me from the people and environments that I need to get away from. All the things that were holding me back are disappearing from my life.

I hated my job, not only was the pay trash but the work environment was much like high school; middle school in fact. A lot of gossip and drama, I was afraid to be myself in fear of being attacked and talked about. I was never relaxed and constantly on edge. I begged and prayed to get out of there, and God took me out.

My living situation is good for as good as having a roommate can be. No major complaints, but I am better by myself I've come to learn over the past year and a half. When I live by myself I am productive, healthy and active. I have a serious lazy bone within me so having a roommate brings out the worst in me. I have someone around to be lazy and just hangout with. I don't feel the need to go out and socialize much because I have entertainment at home. My eating habits switched to hers and so did my drinking; not that there's anything wrong with it, but when you're by yourself you're more conscious of what you're doing and eating. Plus, drinking alone is no fun so it rarely happens. I'm just a better me all around when I live alone, my only distraction is myself.

So here I am in the middle of a big scary change and I'm okay with it. It's all about listening to God/the universe/whatever you want to call him, and really being quiet so you can hear what he's telling you. If I spent time complaining and being upset over all of this happening I wouldn't understand what was going on. It would be "why, why, why" instead of "thank you, thank you, thank you", my perception would be skewed. I am fully aware of why this is happening, because it needed to happen. Yeah the timing wasn't right for me, but God feels otherwise and said it had to happen NOW. I haven't had a breakdown...yet, and I don't plan on having one either. I plan on getting a new job soon, the right job and having a smooth transition into my new place and a smooth transition into the next phase of my life. I'm super excited!

P.S. Once I am all settled and in order a lot of upgrades and better content will be featured on this blog. I want to be a part time professional blogger. I've been doing this for too long to be half-assing it like this.

Cheers to major life changes!

-Namaste

I'm Not Moving

I decided to renew my lease with my roommate, I was originally supposed to move in July but she's getting married in December so I can hold out until then. I was pressed to move because, I didn't tell anyone but...I was going to buy a condo. I found a few that I loved and my bids weren't high enough so people outbid me, at the time I was bummed out, now I see it as a blessing. Buying a home is a big step and commitment and it was a commitment I was ready to make. I was ready to make the commitment, not spend the money. I have the money to do so and the credit, I've been saving my money fairly well and I saved my tax return. It was so hard not to do anything rachet with my return; like buy some Malaysian Silky or go on a shopping spree. If I would've bought a house all of my savings would be gone, I would move in with zero in my savings and I would be stuck in my new house because I can't afford to go out anywhere. So mentally, yes I was ready to buy a house. Realistically, no I'm not ready.

It was something I wanted to do because I felt like I haven't accomplished anything significant yet. Owning a home to me was saying "No I don't have a college degree yet, no I'm not married, no I don't have any kids, no I don't have a career, but hey I own a home so I'm a grown up too". My mortgage would be cheaper than rent but the initial moving and set up and home buying expenses would set me back and frankly...I'm tired of being set back. My path isn't the same as everyone else, my life isn't like everyone else so why am I comparing my progress with theirs? Owning a home would be nice but now that I'm being more real with myself, it's not a top priority. I want to have money in the bank, I want to travel, I want to go out, that's where I am in life. I might be late but I showed up. I'm learning to live and love and be me without the worry of judgement. Everything with work out in it's own time, I will own a home at the right time. In December I might be singing a different song but for right now, I'm good.

-Namaste

Blurbs

I rarely check my mail and when I do I never open it. School has never been my thing, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!! I'm just in college right now because I know this is something I need to do, my goal this semester was to get straight A's...not happening. Well, I finally opened my mail that I've been collecting on my nightstand for 3 weeks and there was 2 letters from my school asking me to accept my membership into the honors society! Whaaatttt, I've attended 2 colleges before and never been asked to be in anybody's society because I never had the grades. My first year at this current college I did really well, so they wanted me to join. Deadline was February 4th. Of course it was. Now I'm not doing my best so they aren't going to ask me again anytime soon. I couldn't believe it, I was so happy and proud of myself, I achieved something I never thought I could...even though I missed the deadline.

Other than that, I have so many plans for this blog and I know the aesthetics keep changing but the content is still the same. I'm not sure of what I want my blog to actually look like yet, so I keep playing around with it. There are many elements, topics and features I want to add to the blog. Such BIG plans I have tucked away in my idea journal that I need to incorporate onto this lovely little blog of mine. I also wanted to share more personal post and pictures, I need to save up for a real digital camera so I can do that. I hate using my phone. This blog and I are a work in progress, please be patient with me.

Life is GREAT! I have begun to experience a level of happiness that I've never been able to reach before in my life. This is the deep rooted happiness that surrounds your life even when nothing is happening. That's what I'm going through right now. I am falling in love with life.

Tax time! Please oh please do NOT be ignorant with your tax return. If you have goals to save your money or start a business, use your return to invest in your future...not your wardrobe. This year I'm finally getting a decent return and it's going straight into my savings. I would love some new clothes and gadgets but I can't tell you how many times large sums of money have come into my possession and I blew it all. I can't even tell you what I spent it all on, but it's gone. If you take care of your money and are smart with it, you will get more of it. Respect your refund check!

I'm really saving my refund because I'm moving in a few months. I feel like I'm always moving or I'm never settled anywhere. That might just be part of growing up and being on your own, finding a place that feels like home. When I moved last July, I moved in with a roommate...horrible idea. I don't dislike my roommate, I just dislike having a roommate. I love, love, love living on my own. I love only having people in the house if I want them there and if I invited them over. I love being alone in my thoughts and in my projects. My roommate is away for the weekend and I remember how much I enjoy solitude. I get a lot more accomplished on my own and my focus is intensified. When I get married I'm sure I will love having my husband as a roommate but for now, just me and my dog will suffice.

GET BACK ON TRACK!!!! It's a month and a half into 2013 and we all have goals of how this year is going to be our year. We started on those goals and got off track with some of them, it's okay just hop back on the track. Start from where you are, take the time to figure out what you need to do, adjust the straps and get going! I fell off on the saving money, so today I paid bills and reset my budget on mint.com. Remember to stay on top of your finances you need to be checking your accounts at least once a week. I like to check mine every other day. I also fell off with my school work, I'm just not in the mood this semester. I have no choice but to get on track with that so I adjusted my schedule so I can spend 3 hours a day on my homework.

Whatever it is you need to do to be where you want to be, just get to it! Distractions are going to pop up and throw you off track, you just have to fix the problem before it grows. Enjoy life and face your fears, save money and watch your possibilities grow. Be the best you, you can be!

What's Important To You?

We all have this long list of things that we claim are important to us but we don't spend any time on them. Our health, family and careers, they are oh so important! We stuff our face with processed junk, spend more time on Facebook than on our careers, and when we are with our families we ignore them by texting or playing with our phones/tablets the whole time. When something is important to you, I mean really important, you will MAKE time to nurture it. When you nurture something and give it love, it will grow. Just like a child, a plant, animal and even your dreams. What you focus you energy on grows, whatever you spend time on gets better. Many things hold importance to me but I don't give them my time and energy. I do what I have to do every day and the energy I have left I divide it amongst the important things without focus or passion. I finally stepped back in the gym today after months of being absent and I began to think about what's important to me and why I'm not working on those things. LACK.OF.PASSION

Until recently I've floated through life just getting by on Top Ramen, penny pinching, missed connections with friends and family, shity men, almost in great shape, etc. You get the point. Those so called important things where given little energy and no passion. After I left the gym I headed over to Kroger and resisted the urge to buy all the junk food in site; then I floated over to the health food section and remembered a time when that was all I ate. My health was important to me, so much so that I didn't eat any processed foods or anything that contained more than 9 ingredients! I wanted to have a clean body and my health was important to me! When I walked out to the parking lot I looked at my car that I have to trade in because the leak in my new car doesn't seem to be repairable, and I thought man...why didn't I just buy a cheap car for 5k so it could be paid off in a year? I used to have no car payments.Why did I have to go with the car that gives me high payments for the next 7yrs? I want to save money, not spend it, having money is important to me!

I realized very quickly tonight that I need to redirect my focus AGAIN. I have to focus on what's MOST important to me and direct my energy to those things. My life would grow in abundance if I did that and so will yours.

THINGS MOST IMPORTANT TO ME: 

1. MY HEALTH- I cannot do anything for myself or anyone else if I'm not healthy. I want to be, look and feel healthy everyday. Eat more natural nutritious meals/less processed junk. 
2. MY FAMILY- Spend more time calling my family, immediate and distant. Find time to visit them more than once a year. Develop a deeper connection with them. 
3. MY FRIENDS- Spend more time with them developing stronger bonds, not just hanging out to get drunk and party. Quality hangouts, dinner, bowling, museums and plays. Make time to call my long distance friends more often. 
4. MY CAREER- Get this degree...get this degree! I remember my bff cried at her graduation and she said it's because it took her so much to get to that day. I feel like I will do the same, this degree seems to be so far away but I have to keep striving. Focus on my blog, the job I have and my passion project (that's a secret for now). Not being an admin now at 30 is very important to me, I have to focus on getting a career job. 
5. MY FITNESS- This is separate from my health. My fitness goals were always to be in the best shape for me, which is everything tight and toned. Lean visible muscles. When I don't work out I lose weight and I'm "skinny fat", which makes me self conscious in certain clothes, flat booty Judy over here.  I want to feel good in everything I put on. I also want to push past my fitness limits with running & weightlifting, etc. 
6. MY MONEY- Like I said, money is important to me so I need to focus on the money I have and the money I want to make. I need my money to be growing & my bank account to be increasing. This means making sacrifices and lifestyle changes. 
7. MY HOBBIES & ACTIVITIES- I have many activities I'd like to dabble in but I don't MAKE time for them. Sewing classes, I have a machine that's collecting dust. Yoga. Writing workshops. Any type of art class, dance class, anything out my ordinary mundane life.Volleyball, I want so badly to play on a volleyball or adult sports league. 
8. MY LOOKS- Yes, my looks. When you look good you feel good. I need to spend more time making sure I look my best everyday. Clothes, hair, nails, skin, body, teeth, all that! 
9. LOVE- Love in all areas is very important to me. Love to and from God, friends, family and my future husband, even strangers. We are lacking so much love in this world that it can't hurt to open my heart more to the universe. It's important to me that I love and be loved in return. 

What are some things that are important to you and are you making time to nurture them?  

Just Say No!

I am 26 years old and I am not where I want to be in life. There are many I shoulda, coulda, woulda's looming in the back of my brain but it's too late for all of that and wanting to change the past is a waste of time. I am 26 years old and I'm working on being who I have always wanted to become. Carrie Bradshaw. Just kidding but you know what I mean. When you don't follow the traditional path of go straight to college and get a good paying job, you can very well end up like me. 26, working a dead end job (full time), while in college, paying grown up bills on a college kid salary. It's not easy and it can be very stressful, this path wasn't the best path for me to take but I took it and I have to accept that. Even if you did take the traditional path you can still end up like me with this economy. Everyday I think about how to get myself out of this situation, it could be worse but I want much better and that's my goal. I will no longer allow myself to live this check to check, have fun when I can afford it type of life. I need to be free from sitting at my desk counting the hours and giving away my paychecks every 1st and the 15th. 

 Some of my friends have grew tired of me, they want to hangout all the time and my answer is usually no. It's not even because I can't afford to or don't want to but it's because I'm either doing homework, writing or working out. They see it as I'm being lame. Which is understandable coming from someone who is where they want to be in life or someone who is comfortable in their current situation (which may not even be good). I have fun when I have the time. Even writing it seems lame but I'm not satisfied. The only way to change my level of satisfaction is to do something about it. Author & finacial guru Dave Ramsey says "Live like no one else, so one day you can live like no one else." I live by those words. 

When I'm posed with a question of "do you wanna hang out?" I have to ask myself, did I do everything possible today to get me to where I want to be tomorrow? If the answer is no, then I don't go. Simple as that. Hanging out is fun, but being in the same situation year after year is unacceptable to me. It's hard saying no to friends but I know in the long run it will be worth it. Most women are worried about finding a husband at this age, I'm focused on my career. This is a different time from when our grandmothers and mothers were 26, women now have to work; well most of us do. These aren't the days where we women live with our parents until the right suitor comes along and sweeps us off our feet and into their kitchen to sweep their floors. We have to work to pay for our own floors to sweep until the right man comes along...and we'll still be sweeping their floors; AFTER we get home from work.

Times have changed and as a women your life has to be in order in all areas. Every little compartment of your life needs to be tweeked and taken care of daily. If you are lacking in the funds department you need to be trying to figure out how to increase your income, if you have no friends you need to get out more and at least get 1 friend, if you don't like the way you look I suggest you figure out why and change it (with out surgery). My friendships aren't lacking and my looks aren't lacking...my issue is my funds and my career. So until that is in order, I just have to say no more often than not. 

What are some sacrifices you've made in order to gain success? Or do you think that you shouldn't have to sacrifice anything? 

Are You Saving Your Money?

If you are over the age of 18 your answer should be, duh who isn't? With all of life's obstacles and hardships and this crazy recession, it can be hard to build a hefty savings. Believe me, my savings account has gone from loaded to drained to loaded then back to drained. I was constantly dipping my hand in the cookie jar, mostly because I was spending money like there was no tomorrow. If you are spending like there's no tomorrow and you make less than 50k a year, you need to stop it. If you are making over 50k a year you need to stop it as well, even though the majority of Americans don't make that much, with the economy these days it's not a lot. But I'm talking to the people like me, the 50k and under club. What are you doing with your money?

The most trouble I've had in the past with saving money is temptation. The temptation to go out and spend my money at the bar, club, mall and restaurants. Even though I was putting money into my savings I had to pull it right back out to cover the bills I should have paid with my drink money. Spending before I had it. If you really want to build a savings here are a few things I had to learn for myself.

1. Work out a budget. Set aside some time to sit down and go over your monthly income and bills. What goes out vs. what's coming in. What is your monthly income and how much of that do you need for groceries, rent/mortgage, bills, etc. Now take that balance and figure out how much of it you want to put into savings. The left over money you can hold onto in your checking account or spend on whatever. Give yourself a limit though, just because you have a savings account doesn't mean you should be okay with having $10 in your checking account.
2. Save before you spend. This means exactly what it says. When you get paid, the next thing you need to do after paying your bills is put that amount of money you decided on into your savings account. Go straight to the bank, do not pass go, but collect $100 if you can. You need to save right away because it's payday and your friend is going to be calling you to go out, your kids want to go to the movies, you girlfriend wants you to take her to dinner. If you don't save right away, you will spend that money before the weekend is over.
3. Get new friends. Now you don't literally have to get new friends or stop talking to the ones you already have, but your friendships will definitely change when you are dedicated to saving you money. We all have those friends who don't have a savings account and live by the motto YOLO. These friends go out every weekend, spend $100 at the bar and go out to eat 6 days a week. Don't forget your shopping buddies! These friends might begin to scatter when you aren't out spending money with them. They might even see you as lame or boring. Don't let the pressure get to you, you know your finances and what your goal is. Watching your money grow will be way more fun than waking up with a hangover. I PROMISE.
4. Plan your fun. Just because you aren't going out every weekend or buying a new pair of shoes everyday. Doesn't mean you can't have fun. Remember all those fun activities you never get to do because you blow your money at the club? You know, the play you wanted to see, the concert you wanted to attend, the Falcons game you wanted to go to? Well now you can do those things because you have the money to do so. If you plan out one really fun event to attend every month, it wont drive you crazy to not go out every weekend. The anticipation of the upcoming activity will be enough to get you through the weekends.
5. Find free/cheap things to do. You can still hang out with your friends every weekend if you want, just set a budget on how much you can spend with them to still be in the confines of your savings agreement. For most people this means not seeing your friends as much, because lets face it...as an adult sitting in each others bedrooms gossiping about the opposite sex is less appealing now. We want to go out and have fun with one another. Look in your local newspaper or Creative Loafing to find some free events in your area, if you live in a city like Atlanta there is always something going on. Movie nights and game nights are always a great idea and very cheap. Everyone will either bring a game or movie to watch along with snacks and drinks, plan who brings what and the night will usually run you less than $10. 

For the serious saver (like myself): 

    6.  Set up an extra savings account. Your main account should be an emergency savings account, money you have saved up in case the pipe burst, you need a new water heater or have to pay for an ER visit. The extra savings account is for a specific goal. My extra account is for a vacation. I never take vacations out of the country. I have before but in my recent years my vacations have consisted of either VA or SC. Some of my friends who have money ask me all the time to go on vacation and I never could because I didn't have the money. Now this upcoming summer I can actually go on a real vacation because of my discipline to save up for what I want. Your goal doesn't have to be a vacation, just something that's important to you like starting a new business or saving to buy a house. Having two savings accounts may seem like a lot at first but once you get the hang of it, it's a breeze. 

If you haven't been saving I hope these steps will make it easier for you to begin saving. Of course you will have slip ups from time to time, but they become less frequent once you start making progress. A tool I use to help me save is mint.com I swear by it. You can add all of your accounts, credit cards & investments onto the site. It will show you how much you owe on each account, how long it will take you to pay it off. You can set up goals and make budgets with your money. This is the best thing ever and has helped me on my financially fit journey. 

HAPPY SAVINGS EVERYONE!!